2 years and 6 months. 916 Days. 21,984 Hours.
I have known you for that long. I have held your hand across 11 seasons of weather and life. Recently, I have laid next to you for 306 consecutive days. Each night I pray to a God who I'm not sure exists that you will be okay. That you won't go too soon. I want to make sure you are safe, and sound. I lay and intently listen for the slow, low breath escape from you to let me know you're okay. I lay in this dark room and see nothing but the stars glowing slightly on out ceiling. I am okay with that because I know you are right here next to me. A tap away in this dark room.
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I am tired.
I am tired of feeling like I have to be so good to these people who don't do the same for me. I am tired of feeling. but it's okay. I have to just wake up and pretend like it's all okay again. like I'm happy. |
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April 2020
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